Recycled Grace: Forgiveness-Growth-Healing
I have not always been good at forgiving those who have hurt me, including myself. So, about three years ago, I decided to stop burying my pain and learn to work through a whole lot of… well… crap. While on this journey, I have learned a few things about forgiveness, growth, and healing from different books, podcasts, sermons, and of course counseling sessions. This blog series, Recycled Grace, will focus on what I have learned from my self-discoveries, how I applied these lessons in my real life, and how these realizations have transformed my relationships.
Forgiveness is Necessary:
As any therapist I ever saw will tell you, forgiveness is a necessary part of the healing process, but it can’t be forced or rushed. Over the next four weeks, I plan on detailing what I have learned about forgiveness, what I discovered it isn’t, and why I so desperately needed it to break free.
“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”
— Lewis B. Smedes
Growth is Messy:
When I think about growth, I am reminded of gardening. Before you can plant a seed, you have to pull out the weeds, prepare the soil, and research which plants grow best in your climate. The work is painstaking, dirty, and far too often, the harvest comes with great sacrifice. In this blog series, I plan on taking a long look at personal growth. I am not an expert in this field. On the contrary, I’m an amateur, at best. Whenever I begin a new season of growth, I start off strong, fail often, dust myself off, begin again, and stumble. It’s an arduous process, but like in any garden, the fruit that survives makes the disappointments well worth it.
“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But, nothing is as painful as staying stuck where you do not belong. Healing is Key.”
—N.R. Narayana Murthy
Healing Hurts:
In order to heal, you have to at first admit there is something wrong. A person can walk on a fractured foot, I don’t suggest this, but with each step, the pain is a constant reminder that something is broken. For decades, I carried around the burden of trauma, and like a ball and chain, I fastened around my own ankle. I looked for quick fixes to feel better, but it wasn’t until I acknowledged how unhealthy I was, that I began the painstaking process of healing. Healing cannot begin until you face the truth… you are not well. You have not been well for a long time. And, until you find the infection, you cannot find the cure.
This is painful. This is terrifying. This is essential.
“Any psychologist will tell you that healing comes from honest confrontation with our injury or with our past. Whatever that thing is that has hurt us or traumatized us, until we face it head on, we will have issues moving forward in a healthy way.”
—Nate Parker
I look forward to sharing my heart with you during this process. I hope you choose forgiveness, I hope you see beyond the mess and grow, but most importantly, I hope you conquer your trauma and heal.
